The Classic Car Code

This is a guide aimed at our fellow motorists who don’t own a Classic Car. Hopefully this little list will make the Classic Owners smile and say, “Yep that’s me” at least once.

1. We treat everybody on the road as somebody who can’t drive properly.
2. We seriously believe that other road users want to crash into us at every junction.
3. Pulling out from a junction at the last-minute in front of us really is a problem.
4. We never trust somebody’s indicator as being their true intention.
5. We give ourselves extra space to the car in front to allow us time to slow and stop as our brakes may not be as good as modern cars.
6. We give ourselves extra space to avoid the chance of any stones being flicked up causing a stone chip on our paint jobs.
7. Our paint jobs can cost as much as a small family car.
8. Stone chips may look tiny to you, but to us they look as big as a satellite dish and just as ugly.
9. It may look like we are drunk while driving although we’re not. We are avoiding the pot holes in the road, you normal car drivers wouldn’t give a second glance to.
10. Pot holes are like moon craters or trenches for classic cars.
11. We spend as much time looking at the road conditions as we do predicting traffic.
12. If you wish to overtake us we don’t mind, but don’t chop across the front of our car, give us space, see points 4, 5 & 6.
13. We will avoid a crash at all costs and we will take extra care.
14. We will avoid mud. That mud stores moisture and starts the rust process off.
15. We are paranoid about rust. We can hear our cars rusting in the garage!
16. We don’t drive close to side of the road where there are hedges as they are a potential for paint damage.
17. We will stop rather than drive past or through a bush or hedge.
18. We will slow down for large puddles.
19. We don’t like rain.
20. We will do everything we can to protect our cars from water damage.
21. Tailgating makes us nervous, we won’t speed up just because you want to go faster.
22. Because we tinker around on our cars doesn’t mean anything is wrong.
23. If you see our car and you don’t like what you see, don’t tell us because we don’t care.
24. We are happy to talk to anybody about our cars, but please don’t tell what our cars should look like or what we have done wrong in restoring it.
25. We will drive around endlessly looking for a safe place to park.
26. If our car is parked somewhere you can guarantee we can still see it.
27. There is no need to touch our cars.
28. Finger prints on our paint is a problem for us. We will clean it off.
29. Leaning on our cars is definitely not acceptable.
30. The tinkle of zips, belts, buckles or the metallic sound of a ring will damage our paint.
31. Young children with ice creams are a potential for more unnecessary cleaning.
32. Dogs using our tyres as a mobile toilet is not acceptable. We will clean it off.
33. We don’t like parking under trees because tree sap can ruin paint. We will clean it off.
34. Birds mess on the car will cause serious damage to paint work. We will clean it off.
35. Dead insects on our cars is unsightly and can cause damage. We will clean it off.
36. Cleaning our cars is a pleasure and some of our cleaning products can cost as much as a tank of fuel.
37. The “You missed a bit” cleaning joke isn’t funny, honestly.
38. No we won’t clean your car when we have finished ours.
39. Yes we do need to clean our car if its been in the garage, it gets dusty.
40. We tend not to thrash our cars around just to prove a point for you.
41. The grip from our tyres may not be as good as modern-day compounds.
42. A set of traffic lights is not a cue for drag race with you.
43. The interior of our classic cars are cleaned with the same care as the outside.
44. Adding fuel to our cars means we will wipe off every single spilt drop.
45. We carry spare fluids in the trunk for all eventualities under the hood.
46. We sit by our cars at car shows to keep an eye on our cars.
47. No you can’t sit in it – don’t ask.
48. No we won’t start our car up just so you can hear it, wait untill we leave.
49. There are two prices for our classic car parts, the proper price and the price we tell our partners.
50. A classic car is not “just a car” to us, it’s a way of life.